You will have to excuse me as I am new to this and must start with an apology of my random rambling...
I am unsure of the things in life at the moment with the exception a few pretty sure things... But this just wasn't in the future that I thought that I had created for myself... I don't really even feel like I quite know or understand myself so I can't imagine that anyone else does and to be honest it really bugs me when they think that they do! Also I hate trying to explain the fact that one is not in love with me but just the idea of me. (It's really not a complicated concept.) I think it would be very difficult to be in love with someone that you don't even fully know especially someone you don't even understand. I think I really need to just take a little bit of time to live and enjoy living! I want to discover more. I have ever allowed myself to discover before. I may not know exactly EVERYTHING I need out of life right now but I definitely know some of what I don't need, and I don't need anything that is going to clutter my life up. I want to be able to relax and not have to worry about everyone else's issues, I have enough of my own :) Now please don't take that the wrong way, if I have made your issues my issues than obviously I have chosen to do so and don't mind or even may want to help deal with those... However I don't want anyone to force their problems on me anymore, it's time to put your big kid panties on, deal with it and figure out your life on your own! My goal for my near future, well at least some of the many goals I have, is to learn! I want to absorb more out of life than I ever have before. I need to, not only for myself but I'm officially responsible for teaching my own some of the greatest lessons in life and I don't feel like I have even figured out a fraction of them myself!! Another goal of mine is to be able to really be free! Freedom is a big part of who I am, I do know that much about myself. Having that sense of freedom plays a huge roll in my overall happiness with everything. -->Random input here, my kiddo just devoured an entire Mozzarella & Cheddar grilled cheese, without feeding any of it to the dog! That is definitely a first! Bahaha! I just feel like there is so much that I am not getting to experience and I hate that. Whats the point of just going through the motions of everyday life? Lame!!! No thank you. No boredom for me, not even as a side. Instead I would like a full order of life, with sides of laughter, greatness, emotions & constant changes! I know that's a tall order but I think I can handle it and to be honest that's just round 1! I must have 2nd's, maybe 3rd's & definitely dessert!!! :) I must say my appetite is very big & I am very much looking forward to all this, especially the uncertainties!
